Anime Review: Soul Eater

By, Rikiryou Rei

K: Hi and welcome back to the anime review.

R: Please enjoy your stay and hopefully, someday, escape the madness.

E: WHAT MADNESS!??????????????

K/R: Exhibit A.

E: STOP TALKING IN UNISON! YOU KNOW IT CONFUSES ME!

K: *ignores* So are we doing “that” anime Rei?

R: Why yes, yes we are.

E: CONFUSION!!!

R: *ignores* We are going to be talking about Soul Eater!

E: STILL CONFUSED!

K: Silence Child, or I shall whack you with my ladle spoon because I forgot my katana.

R: By katana, do you happen to mean that Styrofoam stick hanging above your bedroom door?

K: Oh you silly American, that’s just a decoy.

R: Uh-huh, sure. So, Soul Eater.  This show is focused on six kids in their school. The six children are Maka, Soul, Death the Kid (A.K.A Kid), Liz, Patty, Tsubaki, and BlackStar.

K: HE SHALL SURPASS GOD! Ahem, sorry.

R: Anyways, Soul, Tsubaki, Liz, and Patty are weapons. They are also humans. I’m not exactly sure how it works, but they can turn into weapons. It’s confusing. Soul turns into a scythe, Liz and Patty are twin hand guns, and Tsubaki turns into various ninja weapons.

E: NINJAS!

K: Yeah……

R: ANYWAYS-

K: You say that a lot…

R: ANYWAYS! Maka, Kid, and BlackStar are meisters. These are the people who wield the weapons. Maka is Soul’s meister and BlackStar is Tsubaki’s meister. Now most people only have one weapon but Kid has two, Liz and Patty. The reason for this is because Kid is OCD. For him, everything has to be perfectly symmetrical. If it’s not….

K: YOU PIECE OF UNSYMMETRICAL TRASH! WHAT IS YOUR REASON FOR BEING ON THIS EARTH? WHY DO YOU EVEN EXIST IN THIS UNIVERSE! YOU ARE USELESS! NO ONE LOVES YOU! DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY? IT’S BECAUSE YOU’RE UNSYMMETRICAL!

R: And that’s how he reacts to other people. Now, what you have to understand about Kid is that he’s very serious about his symmetry. Then, you also must know that Kid is unsymmetrical.

K: Heh, he has three white stripes going around half of his head. On his hair I mean, just saying so that there is no confusion.

R: Yes, and when someone points those three stripes out…

K: I’m useless. I’m lower than dirt. I have no reason to live. I’m garbage.

R: Exactly. Now, everyone has their own… problems. Kid’s are just the most entertaining. So that’s all we will tell you.

K: WAIT! Tell them about BlackStar first!

R: Ugh, fine. So, do any of you readers remember the first anime review we did? If not, we did Naruto. You know how he was all annoying and hyperactive. Yeah, that’s basically BlackStar. Except BlackStar has blue hair and this obsession with surpassing God.

K: He’s so awesome.

E: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!l!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I’M SO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

K: And that concludes this review!

R: Oh yeah! CHALLENGE! I put something in here that doesn’t belong. Hint: IT DOES NOT START WITH AN “E”. She does belong here, BELIEVE IT or not. (haha, inside jokes are always fun). See if you can figure out what I put in there.

K: BYEEE!!! [^_^]

 

 

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